Comments on: Engagement Ring. http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/engagement-ring/ The Horse On My Back... Fri, 06 Nov 2009 19:25:00 +0000 http://wordpress.com/ hourly 1 By: pplongstocking http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/engagement-ring/#comment-159 pplongstocking Fri, 11 Jul 2008 19:20:41 +0000 http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/?p=105#comment-159 Dear Javatoo=Java I was wondering... Hope you have found a home. Big job, the house hunting thing. Dear Javatoo=Java

I was wondering…

Hope you have found a home.

Big job, the house hunting thing.

]]> By: javatoo http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/engagement-ring/#comment-158 javatoo Fri, 11 Jul 2008 19:17:58 +0000 http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/?p=105#comment-158 javatoo = java ...I just wasn't signed in. Enjoy your friend :) javatoo = java …I just wasn’t signed in. Enjoy your friend :)

]]> By: pplongstocking http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/engagement-ring/#comment-156 pplongstocking Fri, 11 Jul 2008 19:13:42 +0000 http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/?p=105#comment-156 Dear Javatoo Thank you for your thoughts. Not a good day today, a friend of mine has picked this up on the phone a moment ago and is on her way over. I have a funny feeling she will give me the same advice as you! I will be fine and it will be fine. I know in my heart what I have to do. It can just be very difficult to break out of old patterns though.... I'm going to now crack open a nice bottle of wine and toast my survival skills! I do appeciate your supportive words. Dear Javatoo

Thank you for your thoughts.

Not a good day today, a friend of mine has picked this up on the phone a moment ago and is on her way over.
I have a funny feeling she will give me the same advice as you!

I will be fine and it will be fine. I know in my heart what I have to do. It can just be very difficult to break out of old patterns though….

I’m going to now crack open a nice bottle of wine and toast my survival skills!

I do appeciate your supportive words.

]]> By: javatoo http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/engagement-ring/#comment-154 javatoo Fri, 11 Jul 2008 19:04:43 +0000 http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/?p=105#comment-154 Until this past week or so, being caught up in house hunting, I've read your blog everyday. I just haven't commented as much. And I'm just getting caught up on posts again. It's easy for me to read another's words and see all of the mistakes. But not so easy to voice my thoughts on another's trip. Were I your real life friend, having read everything you've written, I would tell you to be wary meeting with him. Be wary of emotional traps. People can change...but not over night, as romantic as it would be. He has exhibited all of the mood swings and patterns of a person who isn't getting his way. Now he is at the remorse stage. But is it remorse for you, or for himself? Who is it ultimately serving? Were I speaking with my best friend, I would say..."if you reach the decision to meet, let that decision then sit for a few days...and see what happens on his end...how long will he hold this mood before swinging to another...if it doesn't hold...then it wasn't very sincere to begin with. Actions go farther than words." Whatever you decide to do, I wish you luck. You're a smart lady, I'm sure you're aware of all of the above. I'm just offering a little validation to the part of you that has a right to be cautious after what you've experienced. Until this past week or so, being caught up in house hunting, I’ve read your blog everyday. I just haven’t commented as much. And I’m just getting caught up on posts again. It’s easy for me to read another’s words and see all of the mistakes. But not so easy to voice my thoughts on another’s trip.

Were I your real life friend, having read everything you’ve written, I would tell you to be wary meeting with him. Be wary of emotional traps. People can change…but not over night, as romantic as it would be.

He has exhibited all of the mood swings and patterns of a person who isn’t getting his way. Now he is at the remorse stage. But is it remorse for you, or for himself? Who is it ultimately serving?

Were I speaking with my best friend, I would say…”if you reach the decision to meet, let that decision then sit for a few days…and see what happens on his end…how long will he hold this mood before swinging to another…if it doesn’t hold…then it wasn’t very sincere to begin with. Actions go farther than words.”

Whatever you decide to do, I wish you luck. You’re a smart lady, I’m sure you’re aware of all of the above. I’m just offering a little validation to the part of you that has a right to be cautious after what you’ve experienced.

]]> By: pplongstocking http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/engagement-ring/#comment-144 pplongstocking Fri, 11 Jul 2008 18:07:26 +0000 http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/?p=105#comment-144 Thanks Java, I really hear the voice of experience from you. I am just letting it sit for now. It's in the same place I put it the day I took it off. It's been a tough few days, and just when I see some light it all gets dark again. I just don't feel very strong today, I am weighing up in my mind whether I should agree to meet him. A letter I recieived yesterday from him has got me wavering. I appreciate your thoughts and your personal experience. Thanks for stopping by. Thanks Java, I really hear the voice of experience from you.

I am just letting it sit for now. It’s in the same place I put it the day I took it off.
It’s been a tough few days, and just when I see some light it all gets dark again. I just don’t feel very strong today, I am weighing up in my mind whether I should agree to meet him. A letter I recieived yesterday from him has got me wavering.
I appreciate your thoughts and your personal experience.
Thanks for stopping by.

]]> By: Java http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/engagement-ring/#comment-143 Java Fri, 11 Jul 2008 17:55:08 +0000 http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/?p=105#comment-143 I was once involved with a guy with lovely, long hair. During the course of our relationship, he decided to cut it off. I kept the long, ponytail of hair for sentimental reasons. A couple of years later, we broke up. I kept that piece of hair with me for the next year, taking it with me when I moved. So many memories and feelings still attached to it. When I moved again, a year later, I came across it. I was surprised at how somewhere along the way, it had become lost and forgotten in my clutter of "stuff". I threw it in the trash without a thought. Along with the cards, the photos, the books...and the ring. "I know I need to pack them all away. Bury them." Let it sit. It will eventually bury itself. I was once involved with a guy with lovely, long hair. During the course of our relationship, he decided to cut it off. I kept the long, ponytail of hair for sentimental reasons. A couple of years later, we broke up. I kept that piece of hair with me for the next year, taking it with me when I moved. So many memories and feelings still attached to it.

When I moved again, a year later, I came across it. I was surprised at how somewhere along the way, it had become lost and forgotten in my clutter of “stuff”.

I threw it in the trash without a thought. Along with the cards, the photos, the books…and the ring.

“I know I need to pack them all away. Bury them.”

Let it sit. It will eventually bury itself.

]]> By: pplongstocking http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/engagement-ring/#comment-139 pplongstocking Thu, 10 Jul 2008 22:17:45 +0000 http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/?p=105#comment-139 Dear shisymbolinternational, Thank you for you lovely comment. Apoligies for late reply. Felt better after writing this post. Nice to know there's people out there that understand. Dear Miss E The ring has been a bit of a silent issue untill now, I have to admit. I think you are right though, I'm gonna take my time before I decide what to do with "it". Dear shisymbolinternational,

Thank you for you lovely comment. Apoligies for late reply.

Felt better after writing this post. Nice to know there’s people out there that understand.

Dear Miss E

The ring has been a bit of a silent issue untill now, I have to admit.

I think you are right though, I’m gonna take my time before I decide what to do with “it”.

]]> By: leavingevangeline http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/engagement-ring/#comment-138 leavingevangeline Wed, 09 Jul 2008 15:53:39 +0000 http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/?p=105#comment-138 Oh dear. That is one of the hardest things about break-ups, endings, etc. All the physical reminders. I attach so much meaning to things like that. I have "relationships" with inanimate objects...and project feelings and emotions onto them. I can understand what you must be going through. There is no rush though, to sort those things out yet. Take your time, and you will know when it is right. Maybe with the ring, you can change it somehow...make it into a pendant or something. That way you keep it, but change the meaning of it. The ring signifies an important time of your life, but by changing it, you are claiming that time as your own...as something that changed YOU. Oh dear. That is one of the hardest things about break-ups, endings, etc. All the physical reminders. I attach so much meaning to things like that. I have “relationships” with inanimate objects…and project feelings and emotions onto them. I can understand what you must be going through.

There is no rush though, to sort those things out yet. Take your time, and you will know when it is right.

Maybe with the ring, you can change it somehow…make it into a pendant or something. That way you keep it, but change the meaning of it.

The ring signifies an important time of your life, but by changing it, you are claiming that time as your own…as something that changed YOU.

]]> By: shisymbolinternational http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/2008/07/09/engagement-ring/#comment-137 shisymbolinternational Wed, 09 Jul 2008 15:09:26 +0000 http://pplongstocking.wordpress.com/?p=105#comment-137 Not a nice space to be in at the moment but it does get better. When you're ready to move on you'll start the process of clearing out mentally and physically. You never know you might even get your ring melted down and create something new and beautiful to match your new beginning. It will be your symbol for the new things to come in your life then. Enjoy your life and when you're ready, get out there and meet some new friends. The hurting will ease and eventually go as other events replace this change in your life. When you need us we're there for you and all other Singles. Not a nice space to be in at the moment but it does get better. When you’re ready to move on you’ll start the process of clearing out mentally and physically. You never know you might even get your ring melted down and create something new and beautiful to match your new beginning. It will be your symbol for the new things to come in your life then.
Enjoy your life and when you’re ready, get out there and meet some new friends. The hurting will ease and eventually go as other events replace this change in your life.
When you need us we’re there for you and all other Singles.

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